Three-day Insaaanity

I'm falling down fast tonight, falling flat on my face, coz all I see is how dark it is, how cruel and twisted my fate's going to be and how gloomy the world is at midnight. There's a little hope inside me, wanting you to catch me from my fall, wishing that you'd realize how meant to be we are, how long I've swooned over you, and how fast my heart beats for you. -June 5, 2012

I wish we could swap places. I'm hella sure that things would be way easier. I'll be you - the guy, and you can be me- the girl.Then I'd court you, I would show you how much I actually care for you without feeling too awkward about showing it. I mean, I'm not saying I'd wanna literally court you. Seriously, I just want you to see how much I like you. Really. I also want to know id you'd ever like me again. I need an assurance, a go signal, a thumbs up, anything... I don't wanna hang onto something that's not even there. It feels like waiting for rain in a drought, waiting for a mail that got sent a million miles away, waiting for a prince who doesn't even exist. I wanna wait for you and tell me that you feel this too. But, I'm not giving you an infinite time to decide. One day I'm gonna get tired of this blind-eye I'm playing at, I'm gonna be sick of waiting for you, I'm gonna stop fantasizing that we even have a shot. Because... It's taking you forever to realize that, and I ain't sticking that long to wait for you. And, one day, you'll get this crazy too, wishing you didn't let me get away. You'll wish you had realized sooner. Hell yeah, you will. Unless you realize everything now, and save me from this heart break that I'm feeling. -June 6, 2012

I think today is the day that I actually give up and force myself to totally move one and forget everything about you. Well, if I can do it.But... Ugh, I don't freaking know what to do. I just know that it hurts more now than it had hurt before I got myself into believing again that it's different this time. I also feel that I'm such a stalker now or whatever you call that girl who's losing her ind over this guy. Ugh, stupid, stupid! I freaking wanna stop everything I'm feeling for you. I hate myself for being so blind. I hate you for being numb. I hate this! -June 7, 2012

So... Okay... Doesn't the title fit what you just read? Yes, I'm not going to deny this, but I kinda get insane when I am "in-love". Sorry, forgive me, I'm just a girl. Joke. Anyway, it's funny how different you would feel after about 5 weeks and yet during that time, it was all you ever thought about, heck HE was all I ever thought about. I guess it's not really funny at all. Well, kinda maybe, like how pathetic I were. But honestly, now I'm going to wait for whatever I must be waiting for. I swear, I'll limit myself when being too emotional like that. I won't let my world revolve around one guy ever again. (Well, I hope so! Haha!)